Wednesday, August 7, 2013
Kaiju Invasion
Archaeologists are at it again, but this time they are conducting research in the depths of the Gulf of Mexico. Researchers from Texas State University in San Marcos and Texas A&M Galveston have stumbled upon three shipwrecks dating from the early 19th century. These so-called scientists believe the wrecks were caused by a giant storm. This is an unlikely story as everyone knows global warming was not occurring then and thus there were no massive storms able to destroy these hardy ships. One measuring 84 feet long and 26 feet wide.
A more likely explanation of these devastating attacks is from the Kaiju, creatures which share a dimensional portal with our world. These massive reptilian creatures would have crushed the ships with one punch of their gargantuan hands or a deadly swipe with their lethal tails. Fortunately, these were probably the only victims of the Kaiju attack at the time since our world was not yet ready for the taking. Given recent calculations we will soon be inundated by these creatures, if only industrialization had not taken place we could have prevented this invasion of our beloved world and our untimely demise. Supposing we had giant robots to defeat these abominable creatures we could be saved!
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